when i first started wearing hijab, and what i wish i would have known then

I remember the day I decided I was a Muslim (my parents and family are disbelievers---one Agnostic/almost atheist---one-not-practicing-the-word-person-of-the-book---and one spell-casting pagan Wiccan [ironic that the pagan was the most supportive of my conversion/reversion). I had always believed in the five pillars of Islam, but it was time for me to start obeying the Qu'ran and the Messenger of Allah (S.A.W.).

The thing I started with was wearing hijab because that was the only thing I knew anything about. I knew Muslims had to pray five times a day (and I did that), but I didn't know that there was a way to do that (I didn't know to say Al Fatihah or make ruku ect. and I didn't have a book or computer yet with which to look that up) but I did know (from a trip in the Gulf and having known African Muslim women) that a Muslim women should wear a headscarf that some call "hijab" when she left her home or went out among those who she could never be certain of their intentions towards her.

Wa qul li al-mu'minat yaghdudna min absarihinna wa yahfazna furujahunna wa laa yubdina zenatahunna illa maa zahara min haa wal-yadribna bi khumurihinna ala juyubihinna; wa laa yubdina zenatahunna illa li bu'ulatihinna aw aba'ihinna aw aba'i bu'ulatihinna aw abna'ihinna aw abna'i bu'ulatihinna aw ikhwanihinna aw bani ikhwanihinna aw bani akhawatihinna aw nisa'ihinna aw maa malakat aymanu hunna aw at-tabi'ina ghayri ulu'l-irbat min ar-rijal aw at-tifl alladhina lam yazharu ala awrat an-nisa wa laa yadribna bi arjulihinna li yu'lama maa yukhfina min zenatahinna. Wa tubu ilaAllahi jami'an, ayyuha al-mu'minun la'allakum tuflihun (Surah an-Nur, ayah 31)

A translation of this is:
And say to the faithful women to lower their gazes, and to guard their private parts, and not to display their adornment except what is apparent of it, and to extend their headcoverings (khimars) to cover their bosoms (jaybs), and not to display their adornment except to their husbands, or their fathers, or their husband's fathers, or their sons, or their husband's sons, or their brothers, or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their womenfolk, or what their right hands rule (slaves), or the followers from the men who do not feel sexual desire, or the small children to whom the nakedness of women is not apparent, and not to strike their feet (on the ground) so as to make known what they hide of their adornments. And turn in repentance to God together, O you the faithful, in order that you are successful

I knew she should do it, because the Qu'ran said "pull your headress [khimar] so that it covers your chest [jube]". It was quite clear to me then (when I was a person who ignorantly said I believe in the Qu'ran but not the ahadith), as it remains even clearer to me now, that covering one's hair, neck, ears, AND chest are compelled in this verse. I still don't understand how some can try and say, that this was just a historical way of getting believing women not to show cleavage. Women at this time period DID cover their hair (so commanding this a second time would have been unnecessary as it was already as obvious to these women as it was to me and many others upon first reading). During this time period when Surah an-Nur was revealed, women were already compelled by revelations in the Jewish and Christian scriptures to cover their hair. Since I was fostered a few months out of the year, by a practicing family of the book, I know the commandments in the Bible very well in memory: But every woman that prayeth or prophesieth with her head uncovered dishonoureth her head for that is even all one as if she were shaven. For if the woman be not covered, let her also be shorn: but if it be a shame for a woman to be shorn or shaven, let her be covered. Corinthians 11:4-16 (King James Version) So the only thing the Muslim women were asked to do in addition to their covering of their heads and hair, was to pull their headresses (which is what the word khimar means) to cover in addition, also their chests, and thus necks. If the Qu'ran wanted to say "cover your chest" instead of covering your chest while covering also covering what you already cover, it would have said, add another button, or where such and such a garment/dress/caftan/blouse that it covers such and such a part. Also, the women that say the headscarf is not necessary usually contradict themselves by covering their hair when in prayer because a hadith narrated by Aisha (R.A) makes it even clearer that one must do so: The Prophet (SAW) said, "The Salat of a woman, who has reached puberty, is not accepted unless she is wearing a Khimar." (Sahih - Al-Khamsa except An-Nasaa’ee) Studying the hadith, I have found numerous narrations describing what women of the sahaba wore, and going out of the home, it inlcuded the headcovering. Now that I know more about hijab, I know that wearing tight clothing is actually worse than not wearing a headscarf, and now that I have studied the subject of hijab in depth, I am aware that a headscarf was not the first and most important object of dress that a woman was required to do as an obligation to her Creator. A modest overgarment (jilbab) was actually required of women of the Sahaba, before correcting how they wore their headresses. This is because the ayah regarding jilbab was revealed BEFORE the one concerning khimar/hijab. But that is simply something I didn't know when I first made my shahada.
So when I set about trying to first wear hijab, I had no long sleeves, so I bought a white cotton button-up blouse (not tunic length but average), and a few pashminas. I also bought a couple of sheath dresses, which I layered overtop of my trousers and then wore hijab with. Alhahamdulilah, I was always spot on with wearing the khimar (I have decided not to call it hijab on this site from now on, because hijab is the entire aura of modesty a Muslim woman embodies not just her headscarf and so the term is sooooooooo often misused) so that it covered my chest, but the rest of the outfit was too tight. Sometimes, you could see the indent of my hips, or the curve of my butt. Ladies, LOL, in the words of Baba Ali, that's not hijab! Plus, this was soooooooo hot. Eventially I found looser dresses, but the pants were still too curvalicious. The shape of even my calves showing didn't seem like proper hijab. I started wearing a long skirt, and layering a long coat over my shirts, and that was aLOT more modest and Islamic, but the fact was, while I was wearing an overgarment on my top with a trench coat or long tunic here and there, I still wasn't wearing an overgarment since the coat wasn't covering all my skirt. If I had worn something under the skirt, I think it would have been fine, and would have met all the requirement of hijab, but it would have been waaaaaaaaaaaaay too hot. So I started wearing abaya, or maxi dresses and long tunic/or coat as a jilbab, and that DID meet all the Islamic obligations of the Qu'ran, and it was alot less hot as well. I personally do not think pants can count as Islamic hijab unless they are loose enough to wear baggy shorts or a mini-skirt underneath of (which, I do admit I have started to see from emerging designers) because unless they can be worn as an overgarment, they don't count as hijab. This goes for way too tight abayas as well. If I can see your hips and butt that abaya ain't jilbab baby girl. If you have cut outs in the dress, or it is see-through, you better be wearing something just as modest underneath of that, or, IT AIN'T HIJAB.

Hijab is a religious obligation to Allah (S.W.T). It should not be enforced by a government, a religious institution, or culture, because it is indeed a choice that one only owes out of respect for themselves, and thus respect for their Creator. The only one that will judge anyone on the subject will be Allah (S.W.T), but this blog will outline (along with style:D) what Allah (S.W.T) HAS set down as mandatory for the Muslim woman who respects herself (and so shows her respect for her Creator). It is more than a headscarf, but also modesty of action and intention. If you are a Muslim new to practicing Islam, always wear non-see through clothes, and a headcovering when you pray, and try to get an Islamic wardrobe as soon as you afford to. On top of that though I will add, in order to cover your skin, don't worry about your sleeves touching the elbows ect if it means wearing tight clothes. Try to wear looser clothing first as you gradually incorporate more coverage into your wardrobe as you have the means too. It is better to go out in public in clothing that is modest in your culture rather than supertight but all skin covered and with hijab-hijab. When I first coverted/reverted, rather than wearing an oxford, trousers, and booty-hugging pencil skirt over my trousers with hijab, I should have not worried so much about slapping that headscarf on, but should have kept wearing my rather modest sleeveless dresses from Africa, and layered a three-quarter sleeve cardi over it (and probably no hijab--since I couldn't even know all the requirements of hijab or explain to others about them I wasn't necessarily ready to get reward for my khimar). Better loose and practically all covered, than all covered but the shape of the body entirely apparent, making the headscarf seem instead ironic, rather than pious. For those who live in a predominately Muslim country--you have NO idea how lucky you are with what is readily available to you.