ILOVEHISHMA hates "Muslim" Playboys

I know Arabs aren't the only play-with-your-heart fools out there (I held out rather well in the dating feild of parties and clubs and highschool), and as a Muslim woman who doesn't mix with sexes (I am not friends with them, though I can work side by side with them, or learn and teach about Islam with my brothers in the religion but I never expect a halal and healthy relationship to come from a haraam interaction) I am protected on all sides from getting "played" or having my heart broken.

In my hijab, and my approachable banter about how I love my deen with your average non-muslim Canadian girl on the street (who looks the very image of me before I reverted/converted) I am often approached with questions about Islam, like where to buy hijabs, what are the rights of a Muslim woman, how to become a Muslim woman. My husband likes to think that Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala has made me a tool for all of this, but the truth is, in Islam a woman often comes to the decision to become a Muslim through her own research... Or, as many of these girls I have been approached by, if you ask them where they first learnt about Islam from... they will tell you from their Arab boyfriend. Egyptian, Saudi, Syrian, Somali (these are the most common in my city (and every woman in a store I commonly shop from is dating a "Muslim" Saudi). And I am tired of poor Mexican girls coming to learn about Islam and then their "Muslim" boyfriend breaking up with them as soon as they are serrious about practicing the religion. It makes me sick, and makes my Saudi husband sick. Where is their hayah?! Where is their fear of Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala?! Any sin they committ with a non-muslim woman is worse in the eyes of Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala than one he committs with a Muslim hijabi because at least the Muslim hijabi knows her rights, and the sin is just as much on her shoulders. With the non-muslim woman the sin is all on his, since this girl doesn't know her rights over him in Shariah. She deserves the same route to marriage that we do, the same respect. I know alot of good brothers who respectfully married non-muslim women that they met through chance encounters, not haraam dating, and who they gave their Islamic rights to. Key: if a Muslim man respects you he will marry you, not date you. Plain and simple.

When they tell you their interest in Islam was first piqued by the faith of these non-practicing, club-going, likely alcohol-drinking fornicators, my first reaction is to to jump down these girls throats and scream, if this tool respected you OR his religion he would have already have set up a marriage for you, and explained how men and women don't mix, and he would have gotten you a wali.... I stop myself from this because you don't want offend them about this man they love. I tell them, I am nun who has all the rights a nun doesn't, to be equal to a man in the eyes of God, and to fall in love and marry a person who deserves me. A Muslim man, whether I am Muslim or not, isn't allowed to date or be alone with a woman. Every woman has the right from a Muslim man for him to marry her before he even touches her, to promise to provide for her financially, and give her a home, and food and clothes, and the other rights she has a right to request at marriage. I gently inform them that their man isn't practing his deen to the best of his ability, and they can't become a Muslim just for him. It has to be about them, and their relationship with God, or it won't work, and they'll leave the deen if their man leaves them.

I want every non-muslim woman dating an Arab out there to know, the Muslim community is on YOUR side, not the not-so practicing man's, and you can't become a Muslim to please a man who is hardly a practicing Muslim. If a Muslim man respects you he will marry you and avoid being alone with you until you two are married. There are no fiances that are safe for you to be lovely dovey with in Islam. You meet to know that you could have a relationship together, and then you plan the wedding. Even if you aren't a Muslim, he is supposed to marry you. Alot of people often become Muslim after they are married. Or continue your search without that fool. Islam is the truth. That's the plain and simple reason why so many women who learnt about it from some loser "Muslim" guy are still Muslim. There is only one big scary beautiful and awesome truth, that no matter how you go around trying to disprove it, you realize it is more real and accurate than anything else out there (I am talking about the Qu'ran). Why I became a Muslim? Because Islam is the truth, and it is beautiful, even if alot of people who claim to practice the religion are not, and don't deserve to be the first Muslims you meet.

Arab/Muslim men: I am waaaaaaaaaaay too tired of telling some blonde or Mexican girl who I've met at the mall that you don't really love her, and that you make our religion look bad, and that she is a woman whose search with Islam shouldn't begin with trying to keep you or get you back, ya know? Have a little fear of Allah subhanhu wa ta'ala and love for your sisters in the deen out there, by treating women who could be Muslim sisters with the same kind of respect you want your mother and sister to have. Khadija R.A was a convert/revert. Treat every non-muslim you meet with the kind of respect you'd give her, and we'd see more Muslim women in this world. I love you for the sake of Allah you idiot little brothers. Serriously. Be honorable men, and see the honor in the possibility of a person, and not be selfish pigs.